I Forgot My Wallet

What should have been a routine 7-11 run became quite the kerfuffle. I gathered my items, headed to the counter, and as I went to pay, I realized I forgot my wallet. I also realized that I had no clue how to communicate that to the clerk. 

I was having a pretty lazy sunday, but towards the midpoint of the day I had a pretty bad headache brewing. I felt some pressure in the center of my forehead, and the more I tried to ignore it the worse it seemed to get. I had been sniffling all day, I was still fighting off a cold I had all week, so I figured that could be the cause. Either that or fatigue from looking at screens. 

Even though it was getting late, I laid down for a while. It did help me feel a bit better, but I certainly didn’t want to get up. I had to though, telling myself that I would stop by in the morning never goes according to plan, so I willed myself out of bed and off to 7-11.

Going to 7-11 is basically my daily routine, grabbing coffee and lunch for the next day at the very least. Often I’d grab a snack, maybe something for breakfast tomorrow, or whatever else appealed to me. It was a nice little excuse to get some fresh air, and it was also the place where I was able to pay my bills. 

Japan still loves its paper bills, and so twice a month I can expect to get a bill in the mail that I have to pay at a convenience store. Weirdly though, these bills have to be paid in cash, or through some points system I don’t have set up. Thankfully there’s an ATM at 7-11, so I can grab cash before paying whatever bill is due. 

I’d been putting off paying this bill, but on my earlier trip to 7-11 I withdrew some money for this exact reason. So, I grabbed my coat, grabbed my bill, summoned up whatever energy I had left and went to 7-11. I picked up some coffee, some lunch for tomorrow, something for dinner, and went to the clerk. 

They scanned my items, I pulled out my bill and asked for them to add it as well. They asked if I wanted it all together and I said that was fine. I reached for my wallet, and came up empty. I checked all the other pockets in my bag, nothing. I patted myself down, still nothing. I felt a little sheepish, and tried to tell the clerk I forgot my wallet. 

I didn’t know the word for wallet, so hoping it was a katakana word I tried that, and he seemed to understand. Thinking I had communicated things alright, I grabbed my bill, and got ready to put everything back. Instead, the clerk seemed to be asking for something. I thought he didn’t understand me, so I tried to repeat myself. 

He repeated his request again, and I could feel myself start to get flustered. Another clerk came by and started parroting his request. I grabbed my phone and typed “I forgot my wallet” and showed them. They continued trying to make some kind of request from me. 

Eventually, I got a sense of what they wanted, and pulled the bill back out from my bag. They had to scan the bill again to cancel the request, and now I really felt embarrassed. When they handed me the bill back I stuffed it in my bag, grabbed all my items and walked away quickly. I put everything back and started walking home. 

I was annoyed at myself for forgetting my wallet in the first place, something I almost never do. I had worn a different jacket for my earlier 7-11 trip, and left my wallet in the jacket pocket. I was embarrassed at having fumbled that interaction pretty spectacularly. More than anything, my head still hurt.  

I’ve gotten pretty comfortable with transactions at places like 7-11, but something like this reminds me that as soon as something is outside my comfort zone, I tend to panic. I was able to tell the clerk I forgot my wallet pretty easily, but I got so wrapped up in trying to communicate that I didn’t pay attention to what he was saying. 

To be fair, I didn’t know some of the words, but I did notice he kept saying “paper”, but I thought he was talking about using cash or something. It was a pretty simple misunderstanding, made more complicated by a language barrier, but it did get me thinking. 

I forget where I saw this, but I once saw something saying “Do you listen to respond, or do you listen to understand?”. It had really caught my attention, because I tend to pride myself on being a good listener, but I had caught myself doing this more often. 

Around my friends, I would sometimes be listening to them, and then think of a response, something they said where I had a comment or a funny joke would get stuck in my mind. After that, I would tune out what they were saying, and I would be listening for a break to respond. I wasn’t really listening to them at that point, I was just listening to jump in with what I was thinking. 

Now, not being able to really understand my conversation partner in this case means this probably doesn’t apply quite as neatly, but it still seems relevant. I wasn’t really listening to the clerk and trying to figure out what he was saying, I just assumed he hadn’t understood what I was saying. 

During my time here in Japan, I’ve had surprisingly few miscommunications. Usually with google translate and my limited Japanese, I can make myself understood, and usually figure out what the other person is trying to communicate, or at least get the gist. In this case though, I wasn’t really trying to understand the other person, just to make sure I was understood. 

It felt like a reminder about communication, that language barrier or not, it’s always a two way street. Insisting on whatever point you’re trying to make means you’re probably missing out on what the other person is saying, even if you don’t quite understand. Next time, I’ll take a breath and actually listen, or at least remember my wallet.